What causes falling out of love? Why is it so hard for us to accept it? We will answer these and other questions in this article.
Falling out of love, like falling in love, is natural. However, it is a situation that always saddens us. Stop loving someone who has given us so much, with whom we have shared moments, about whom we were so excited, plunges us into a sadness that seems to have no end.
What happened? This is what we will talk about next, as there are reasons why the end of a relationship may be closer than we think.
What are the 5 most common causes of falling out of love?
Although there are many reasons why a falling out of love can occur, we have decided to choose 5 of them to discuss them in greater depth. They are quite general and repeated causes, reasons that lead any relationship towards its breakdown.
1. The interests are no longer the same
The first of the causes of falling out of love is when interests change. Suddenly, one of the members of the couple wants to go live abroad or have children, when during all this time it was not like that. The moment the priorities and dreams are not the same, the bond weakens.
2. Respect has been lost
The second of the causes of falling out of love has to do with respect, something that should never be lost in a relationship (at least if we want it to be healthy).
The moment there are insults, the other person is denigrated or verbally abused, there is no longer room for love.
3. Excessive and unfounded jealousy
The third of the reasons for falling out of love is jealousy. Any type of jealousy towards the couple, which is maintained over time and is not resolved, is pathological.
Sometimes it requires the intervention of a professional psychologist. This undermines the relationship, fills it with mistrust, and damages it until all that remains are its fragments.
4. Lack of care for the partner
The fourth of the reasons for falling out of love is carelessness, due to everyday life and habit. The lack of details, of wanting to surprise, of buying the couple something they like on any given day. This lack of care for the other will end the relationship and lead to a progressive falling out of love.
5. Needs are not being met
In this fifth of the causes of falling out of love are the unmet needs. We are not only talking about intimacy (lack of sexual desire or sexual relations), but about lack of hugs, active listening, quality time shared. If the needs are not met, the relationship will become fragile.
Tips to overcome heartbreak
Something that is very important to keep in mind in any relationship is that nothing is safe. Therefore, taking care of the couple, pampering them and ensuring that they build a good relationship is necessary.
However, there are situations that are not in our power. Like the interests that change or the needs that are not satisfied because they are no longer compatible. What to do then? Coping with heartbreak.
Accept that it is normal
We already mentioned it at the beginning. We accept love, but not heartbreak. We have great rejection of this because of the pain it causes us, but we are not the only people to whom this has happened.
In addition, although we do not realize it now, we will find someone to be excited about when we heal.
Cope with grief
The duel hurts; It is like a thorn that sticks in and that we try to pull out. But immersing ourselves in a relationship quickly so as not to go through it is a mistake.
Grief allows us to accept falling out of love, mourn the breakup and focus on ourselves. Let’s get our emotions out and love each other more than ever.
Avoid contact with your partner
Silvia Congost, a psychologist specializing in emotional dependence, talks about zero contact. This is essential to put distance and that the wounds begin to heal.
Many couples who have not finished badly do so to be able to mark a distance and go through the duel.
Do things alone
When we are in a couple, sometimes we forget what we like to do alone or we feel insecure when going to the movies, going for a walk, having a drink in a cafeteria without someone by our side.
It is time to be with us, to do things for us, to enjoy the space we now have and the time that we no longer have to share with a partner. Now only we matter.
There are no shortcuts in falling out of love
We tend to simplify the path of heartbreak, when it should receive the importance it deserves. In falling out of love there are no shortcuts, there are no nails that take others out.
There is pain and a lot, but in the end, there is a very special reunion with ourselves that will allow us to be with someone again and enjoy the act of loving again.